"Ain't you coming?" she asks, tossing the words over her shoulder like it's nothing.
Snap. Back to reality. Right—walking. I should be walking.
Must've glitched for a second there. This had to be a bluff. Right? Right??
I catch up to her, awkwardly hugging my bag like it's my emotional support animal.
Now what? What do I say?
"Hey Ruth, funny story… remember when you casually confirmed we were dating in front of the entire tuition center?"
Yeah, no. That's a terrible opener. Abort.
I glance at her, my mouth already halfway into a sentence I haven't figured out yet.
"Hy," I say.
Great start, Shakespeare.
"I, uh… I wanted to ask you something…"
"Oh! By the way," she interrupts, completely hijacking my tragic rom-com buildup,
"I told your friends we're dating."
…
I'm sorry, WHAT now?
My brain throws a blue screen error.
System rebooting in 3… 2…
"Why?" I ask, trying to sound chill while my soul is screaming in six languages.
She shrugs. "Your friends said you liked me."
Oh. Oh no.
Those traitors.
Those absolute backstabbing goblin-tier gremlins.
I'm gonna shave their eyebrows in their sleep.
"Ahm, about that—" I try to protest, but she keeps going.
"And I figured rejecting you when you weren't even there felt kinda mean, so… yeah. I just said we're dating."
WHAT KIND OF LOGIC IS THAT?
"I didn't want to hurt your feelings, so I started a fake relationship with you."
Ma'am, this is not how we solve problems on Earth.
I nod slowly, trying to process. My internal monologue is throwing chairs.
She turns to me, dead serious now.
"So yeah, that's the current situation. It's either I reject you here and now…"
But I didn't even propose!!
"…or we actually do this."
Silence.
I stare at her like I'm trying to solve a crossword puzzle with only the color red.
This is not how I imagined dating would start.
There were supposed to be flowers. Maybe some awkward texting. Not… emotional blackmail with a side of miscommunication.
I weigh my options.
Say "no," get rejected, and become a walking meme until I graduate.
Say "yes," and suddenly I'm in a relationship I didn't apply for.
What do I really lose?
Self-respect? Already gone.
Dignity? Hanging by a thread.
Control of my life? Never had it.
…
"Sure," I say, grinning like an idiot.
Curse you, humanitarian side.
You never let me live in peace.
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